Daily Archives: April 12, 2015

Independence or solitude?

Posted on

700 friends and not a single soul that I can really reach out to for a day of fun in the sun at my alma mater. Where has everyone gone?

There’s a hole inside of me and I don’t know what to fill it with. People say ‘oh this is the best time to find yourself, etc. etc.’ but while I’m trying new hobbies and still being the same ol’ YouTube junkie, I’m just sad that I have no best friend – someone I can tell everything to and do anything with.

ARGH why’d he have to do this. Why’d he give up on our friendship?

It’s hard not to dwell when things were so much more different last year than they are now. It’s hard not to think of him. It’s hard not to compare the days that were the best memories for when I made him wake up early on a Saturday and volunteer with me and we got to do all the fun, free activities together.

That was the best Picnic Day. And now it’s just a figment of the past.

It’s hard to be content with how things are going when you have no one to share your wins with. Everythign that we had planned I constantly think of, but there’s no point in hoping that any of that stuf can possibly happen again.

Honestly, why is it so hard to let go? I made mistakes, he made mistakes. Ugh. Redundancy.

I miss my best friend.